Something I said last year at SXSW (on the civility & blog conversation panel I was on), and during the nasty little brou-ha-ha at WaPo during their comments shut down, is that we are in a period where people finally have the power to say things–and don’t quite know how to use it eloquently just yet. There’s lots of folks who grew up with dads spleen-venting at Walter Kronkite, so they feel they should be spleen-venting too. Not to mention folks who use venting on message boards/forums/people’s blogs as a way to deal with their dull little cublicle lives…(and then there are organized groups who do it to “bully”…)

Thing is, online conversation is a weird and subtle form of communication. Weird in that it doesn’t have the usual body-language to help it along. Subtle in that, once you’ve been doing it for awhile, you can see who’s “real” and who isn’t. I’ve been around it for so many years that it’s second nature to me, and have subsequently developed certain skills that help me understand what’s happening in comments.

To fully understand how to deal with comments is like learning the subtleties of a different culture. Think of it this way: you can learn to speak perfect Parisian French in a classroom and study all of the culture and custom. But will you feel comfortable when you’er actually in Paris? Or feel that you are just as Parisian? Probably the first time you think you are is when someone will make it very clear that you’re not.

Community, and how one participates in it, evloves over time–and it’s only through practice that we’ll eventually get how to be good at it